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Transcript of Episode 10:

Ep 10: From Body to Mind: How children learn to master emotions

Dr. Kimberly Bell: [00:00:00] Hi, and welcome to The Hidden Language of Children. Are you interested in knowing your young child in a whole new way, understanding what’s really going on in their developing mind? Does your child say or do things that make you stop and wonder? Where did that come from? I’m your host, Dr. Kimberly Bell, clinical director at the Hanna Perkins Center for Child Development in Shaker Heights, Ohio, where we work with families to help children know how to handle their own feelings to become the boss of themselves. Today

I’m super excited. We are talking with Rique Sollisch. Rique was a longtime teacher in our preschool, and now when she’s not busy adoring her grandchildren consults with childcare centers and preschools for our community engagement division. Our topic today is how to help young children learn to manage all of their feelings.

Welcome, Rique.

Rique Sollisch: Thank you.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I’m [00:01:00] so excited to be talking to you about this tonight. Me too. Yeah, so this is a very big topic. Like we’re not gonna master it, obviously, all in one day,

But let’s start talking about the importance of learning how to manage your own feelings. Underline the word own.

Rique Sollisch: When you work with young children, you and you begin at the point that says, we all have feelings. We have to know each other. We have to have a relationship in order to appreciate one another’s feelings. We don’t want to walk in and STOP!!! feelings because they make us scared or they make us worried. We want to appreciate them.

We want to acknowledge that everybody has feelings. We want to say to children — when a child can’t express themselves — “It looks like you’re a little bit worried. It looks like you have a question.” When we say to a child, “use your [00:02:00] words” we are often talking to children who don’t know what words to say.

So our job is to offer.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: That’s, oh, it’s an interesting place to start. ’cause here’s what it brought to mind. Adults can understand that they have big feelings sometimes, that they get angry that I was just exhausted and I lost it and I started yelling at my kids.

And I feel terrible about it. My life is stressful and overwhelming. And yet when you see a child having difficult feelings, there is this instinct to stop it, and almost to say like, “why are you having that feeling?” Or to judge it or to want to fix, handle and change it. And I think what you’re saying is so important because you’re saying that we have to start by respecting the fact that all the feelings are normal.

Rique Sollisch: All feelings are normal.

We want to say to the child, and we want to help parents [00:03:00] understand that when you give a child an opportunity to express feelings, especially in words, you are not giving them permission to boss you, the parent around. And that is I think, the confusion parents have.

” So he is mad. He still has to go.” Yes, of course he still has to go. But the moments you take saying “what a big feeling that must be, such a hard feeling to have” is the most helpful, thoughtful, sensitive thing to say to a child that really does still have to do what you just said.

Don’t do anything. Don’t change anything. Just accept the child’s having a feeling.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: That feels so easy, and I think sometimes is so hard for both parents and teachers, by the way. Yeah. Yeah. Because [00:04:00] there is this sense of, my job is to manage my child’s world, manage this child’s world, and if they’re having a feeling, especially a big feeling,

Rique Sollisch: yeah.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Then I have somehow not done my job.

Rique Sollisch: I’m not reflected well by a child that’s overreacting or making this difficult, so you’re not giving a child permission to say, “I’m not going, I’m not doing this.” You are giving them permission to have a worry about it. Yeah. You still have to go. If there’s any way you can offer to help them…

and unfortunately, that luxury is not always available to a parent, especially even starting school. So it’s unrealistic to say, “I’ll help you at the beginning.” You can say, “your teacher knows how to help you with this feeling. It won’t always be this way. It feels this way right now. Feelings change.”

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I find myself talking to you and just feeling very quiet, like I just want that to [00:05:00] sink in a little bit.

Yeah.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: That you can say to a child, I’m sorry you’re feeling that way right now. It must be a big feeling. It must feel so overwhelming.

But you know what? Feelings change. You’re not gonna feel this way, in a minute. Remember, last week you can, do a callback. You didn’t want to go to school that day either, right? And you went and you had a great time. And so it, I want to create the trajectory here because the way you say it I can see the thread that we start with.

We start with an infant, obviously always that has no. Way to verbalize their emotions and they just experience bodily experiences, bodily sensory experiences. We can, we don’t have to get into that right now. OK. But those things then become labeled first by us as what the feelings are. Frustration, sadness, anger, rage joy, happiness.

All of those things then become more [00:06:00] and more complex, and we want to eventually become a, a teenager, an adult who can say, “Ugh, I don’t want to go to work today.” And have the feeling and get themselves up and we go to work. And what we’re really talking about today is how do you get from the toddler who is throwing themselves on the floor, having their feelings through their body,

right

Dr. Kimberly Bell: to the adult.

Who can drag themselves out of bed even when they don’t feel like it.

Rique Sollisch: We’re hearkening back then to the beginning. When a parent can allow a child to have a feeling that parent is inadvertently showing that they can stand it that their child is having a big feeling. And when a parent can model “I can stand it” the child is watching, internalizing and observing that feelings can be [00:07:00] tolerated.

Not right away. It takes time and that’s why we have to have an inordinate amount of patience. We have to say, this will take time, but you won’t always have this feeling. It won’t always feel this big. A time will come when you’ll be ready to tell me in words.

You’ll be kind to yourself and you’ll give yourself a chance for this feeling to pass and a feeling that you’re ready to try something new will come. When the parent is able to allow a feeling, they are telling their child, allow your feelings, you’ll see, you’ll learn how to manage them.

And instead, a parent gets all riled up and we don’t want our child to have a fit right now in the hall, and we don’t. And that’s understandable.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I think one, one of the things that parents find surprising when they get here and their child is having a trouble and they’ve come for help, whether that’s through our [00:08:00] school or whether that’s in our outpatient clinic because this idea of teaching a child that they can stand their emotions by being a parent who can stand your child’s emotions. And I think sometimes for lots of different reasons, parents struggle with that, or the child struggles or the amount of emotion that a child has is more than anybody can stand and that’s when they come to therapy. And so me as a therapist my job is to be able to stand even bigger emotions. And our goal is to take that bodily expression of that feeling and turn it into words.

And then to modulate that so that it doesn’t have to be such a big feeling. So let’s talk, how do we do it? Like how do we do it besides, we’re just standing there, living in the emotion.

So let’s talk about talking to kids about little, medium and big.

Rique Sollisch: I don’t know what a child is feeling and I can ask all I like, but in the midst of a big feeling, it’s very hard to get to it. [00:09:00] So acknowledging that this must be a very big feeling and it must be a very hard feeling to have. I hope you’ll be ready soon to tell me what is going on and what has brought this on, what’s brought this about, because if I could know where it started we can wonder together how you can, how I can help you stand it. It will pass, but I can help you when I understand more about, what it’s about.

A child that doesn’t want to come in is allowed to sit in his cubby until he’s ready. A child that did his work very well on Monday, but on Tuesday is just staring at the tray and I say, it looks like today it’s hard.

Something’s getting in the way. When you’re ready, I hope you’ll talk with me. I can only wonder and we can wonder together. You might not know right now. It’s OK. I have faith that their confidence will [00:10:00] return and the will to spend a school day being productive will come back. I often hear from parents earlier at arrival that it was a hard morning and I don’t need the whole story. I don’t need the private parts, but it helps me to say to children, did you know that no matter what kind of a day this started out to be, no matter what difficulties went on at home, that school can still be great. This school day can still be wonderful. You may have what went on this morning on your mind.

It’ll come and go. But this day can still be great. And it’s the beginning of learning to be a school child who can do school stuff that’s separate from home stuff.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: So you were… you taught for many years in our kindergarten.

In preschool we encourage teachers to get children to express their emotions in words.[00:11:00]

And I think it shows beautifully the transition from what we want to happen in preschool, which is they learn how to be in a classroom to separate from their parents the basics of academics, but also how to be with other kids, and how to cooperate and how to share, and how to have big feelings and how to miss, and how to separate. And that’s preschool.

And then in kindergarten, what you’re. Demonstrating is this really beautiful focus of, you know what, this can now be just school…

right.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: This can be a place that is just school and at this age you have what it takes to manage and modulate.

You can take that feeling and you can choose not to let it get involved in your school day.

Rique Sollisch: And we can talk about what’s getting in the way. Yeah. But we can move it sometimes when people say What good does talking about it do. Yeah talking about it is doing something. That’s why we talk.

That’s right. [00:12:00] Toward the middle of kindergarten. I once had a student who said to me, you’ve always told us to talk about our feelings, but now it sounds like you’re telling us to manage our feelings that we don’t have to talk. And I said, oh, he was, that was a very sophisticated observation. Yes. The time comes when you can hear either my voice inside your mind, tell you, remind you have a skill now that helps you manage a feeling without a big discussion that is the progress we’re looking for.

And not everybody makes the same progress at the same time, but it’s a reasonable expectation.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah, I sometimes I find myself telling parents there’s a time in early childhood development where you move away from assisting a child with your body, so rocking, cuddling. That kind of thing.

To helping a child with your [00:13:00] words. And so instead of immediately taking over the function of modulating an emotion with your body you loan out your words, to help process that emotion. And I think that’s what you’re talking about here is that step where we move from bodily expression on the child’s part; bodily

…what’s the word I wanted to say? Control, modulation, fixing whatever… on the part of the parent or the teacher. Let’s keep that in mind. But there’s a time for moving away from that physicality of it, and everybody moves into words, not just the child expressing their feelings through words, but the parent or the teacher or the provider of care using their words to help the child use their words.

It goes from body to mind. That’s what we always talk about body to mind. Yeah, that’s, I think that’s so important. So now, and there will be times right where we regress, where sometimes we all need a hug, right?

And even [00:14:00] grownups feel that way. So children will also have those moments.

But what an important step it is. To move from body to mind, both in the expression of the feeling and in the grownup doing the helping,

Rique Sollisch: Even an injury at school is something that we talk about. Let’s let Mom know about this big scrape on your knee.

It really hurts. It is a time when a child might need some physical comfort, but it’s not teacher’s role. I can be the reminder that they can wait till they get to see mom. Or dad or whomever’s coming because I can help them right now with the first aid, but the hug will come, right? Remind, ask for the hug when you get there.

Yeah.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah. And the ability to delay gratification is what you’re teaching there,

right.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: OK. So let’s talk about, when I said talking about like small, medium, and big.

When we know a child is what the rest of the world calls overreacting.

We [00:15:00] say. That feeling’s too big for this situation. Talk about that for a little minute.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah, it, I have, I’ve been known to use the expression, what a big feeling for such a small matter, and it’s a little judgmental. I found many ways of saying just that doesn’t belittle a child’s experience because when you know early, the beginning of kindergarten, every feeling is big. Ask any child they’ll say is this a big medium or little? It’s big that’s what they’ll say because they start out big.

Yeah.

Rique Sollisch: After a while we get to know that there’s medium and there’s small, and we can ask a child, is this a big feeling? Is it more medium, is it more small? We’re just asking, I’m not throwing out a “oh, it’s not that big a deal. Let’s shrink this down.” B ecause that’s not helpful. But we are asking them to remember that we have spent some time learning to [00:16:00] measure exactly what calls for big reactions and small ones, and then eventually, whatever the reaction is, it’s managed on the inside. It doesn’t have to get expressed with your body, and often it doesn’t even need to be talked about.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And then you can use that. Parents and teachers alike can use that in moments of frustration. So you are, let’s stick with kindergarten. So you are trying to follow a pattern to build a series of blocks. And I don’t know, you’ve seen it wrong.

You’ve, the instructions are wrong. Something happens, it falls over. That moment of ugh. That can be little, medium or big, right? In our mind that’s little, right? What would you say to a child working through that moment where you can start, as the teacher, you can look at it and you can see OK, this can become a big deal.

Or maybe that child has a particular trouble with frustration tolerance. And so what are the words that we wrap around that to help shrink the feeling?

Rique Sollisch: I’ll walk over and say, oh [00:17:00] wow, this has fallen to the ground. What’s the feeling? If they can’t come up with the word, I might say, you look disappointed.

You worked really hard on this and now it’s come apart. That’s we, you’re disappointed. And they might say, no, I’m mad. I’m mad that this came apart. There’s lots of reasons that it has turned into something so big. Like you say, it’s not really my work to find out what else could be going on, but I might wonder with the child, is it about the blocks or is it about something else?

Because sometimes that’s what’s making it so big. They can think about it. It doesn’t have to be something we work on therapeutically during school. It’s not hard for a kindergarten student to work with that suggestion.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I was working with a child at a kindergarten out of the country. And that particular kindergarten [00:18:00] didn’t have a lot of finances, didn’t have a lot of resources.

And this was a particularly intellectually gifted child, and he had drawn the most beautiful it was a train, it was like Thomas the train. It was like extraordinary for a five-year-old. OK. Extraordinary. And I over to do the, you should be so proud of yourself thing. And he was sobbing and I said, “oh what is this feeling? What’s happening? You’re crying.” And he said, “I wanted to draw an airplane.” And what had happened on the inside with this child is that he had intended when he got the paper to draw the airplane, but when he got distracted a little bit and he drew a train instead of an airplane, and as an outsider, I was like, why is this such a big deal?

Yeah. And then I said, I’m, what can we do to make this a smaller [00:19:00] problem? This seems to be a trouble. What can we do to make this a smaller trouble? And he was like, I don’t know. And I said would you like another piece of paper? And what I discovered in that moment was that historically they had to ration paper.

Oh.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And so he may not have had the opportunity to just grab another piece of paper and do it, and then we figured out that he could turn the paper over and he could use that, or that he could, in this situation, I was able to give him another piece of paper.

And so it felt like not a big deal to me, but it was a very big deal to him.

But in our verbal exchange, we were able to find a very easy solution, and I think that’s true for blocks falling down, making a mistake on your math paper. And those moments where you can take something big and stand in it with the child, without judgment and be like curious oh, oh, that’s what you’re thinking.

Rique Sollisch: It’s things are not often how they look to [00:20:00] us. That what’s going on for the child isn’t just that his art production turned out to be something that now he’s not gonna be able to fix ’cause there’s no more paper or the blocks have fallen and he’s just really hard on himself about mistakes.

And it’s a time to say, can you find a way to be kinder to you?

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah.

Rique Sollisch: Can you be kinder to yourself and say, I can try again, or I, we’re not there to fix it. We’re there to help the child think in his mind, is it a big, medium or small problem and is there a way to feel better? But it’s a question. It’s not a demand, it’s not an instruction unless they really need a suggestion and… and it’s OK to be really mad that you worked this hard and it fell down. That is a disappointment. Yeah. But it could also mean a lot of other things. So we can’t tell them how to feel.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: The whole reason why this is called The Hidden Language of Children — the [00:21:00] podcast itself — is really for the things that you and I have been talking about.

The things that I’ve always heard from parents is , I’ve never had anybody talk to my child the way you talk to my child.

I’ve never had anyone talk to me about my child, the way you talk to me about my child. And I have pulled other therapists and teachers and that is a common experience that when people come to Hanna Perkins, the thing they say about us is the language that we use and the way that we understand the language of children, whether that’s behavioral language or whether that’s verbal language. There have been times where I’ve had children in my office who they weren’t throwing things and they weren’t talking, but they were roaring like a lion.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And I’ve said that’s closer to words. Because we’re not throwing anything, but we’re not quite at words. But I understand now that this is a feeling that you’re having.

And we can call it a lion feeling for now until we can figure out what the feeling word is for it.

And we move through [00:22:00] this progression of feeling full expression from body to mind. .

Rique Sollisch: Yeah. It’s very hard work and it takes a long time. That’s the most often heard remark from parents to me. How did you learn to talk this way?

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah.

Rique Sollisch: And I always end up feeling I’m not really talking.

I’m asking. Because once the child is involved in the conversation that’s when we get the words. The child may have much more to say about this than I would’ve ever known. And also the child may not know what to call something and I can wonder, is it this?

Would it be best if we tried this again tomorrow?

Reminding that it’s not all lost there, it’s another, there’s another day. It, those kinds of things help the young child so much.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I think this has been so poignant and so full of goodness. We have to move on to the next [00:23:00] section.

But I think we’re gonna revisit this. This conversation in particular with you feels like this is where the conversation begins. The whole conversation, the whole conversation about what we do to help kids who are struggling with emotional modulation.

Whether that be because they’re just developing and everybody needs help, whether it’s because they have a biological diagnosis that makes managing emotions difficult. Whether they have a life situation that is in the moment making big feelings, difficult to manage that this is where our conversation begins.

And so even though we have to wrap up and move on to the next section, I feel like my conversation with you is gonna be begin here and then we’re gonna have other podcasts where we take that conversation elsewhere.

so let me let me give a quick commercial for the school while we’re here talking about it.

Rique, you are such an excellent example of the expertise that we find here at Hanna Perkins in our school. So if you are a parent in the Cleveland area and you like what you’ve [00:24:00] heard about our approach to early education, you might consider enrollment for your little one. In our toddler group or in our preschool, Hanna Perkins has been an early pioneer in social emotional education all the way back to the 1950s when it was still called nursery school.

Our school has rolling admissions, so we’re always giving tours, taking applications. You can get lots more information at our website, hannaperkins.org. That’s H-A-N-N-A , so Hanna, P-E-R-K-I-N-S.org. OK. We want to take time to do this. So this is a section Rique that we like to call, let’s rephrase that.

And this is really a place in each podcast where we try to share with our listeners that kinds of language that we use with children and how we might rephrase things that sometimes we find ourselves saying to children when as adults we’re having big feelings about what’s going on. You ready? Yeah. OK. And the other thing that I said last podcast, [00:25:00] and I think I’m gonna keep saying it, is that we don’t get any prep for these particular things. Like we don’t prepare for this. Bob writes them and he gives them to me the morning of. And so this is our chance to think off the top of our heads about the way that we interact with children in an, in a spontaneous way. Alright. Moments ago two young children were pa playing quietly together, building blocks suddenly without any noticeable provocation, one child pulls a big block from the bottom and the whole structure comes tumbling down. The other child is already winding up to cry.

The first reaction for many adults would be to grab the block out of the child’s hand and say, why did you do that? Say you’re sorry. What would we do instead?

Rique Sollisch: The question is a good one, but I’m not sure it’s the right place to start. That’s a really good point. Excellent point. The idea that you want to run to the child who’s about to cry because they [00:26:00] both just worked so hard, but really both of them deserve that pat on the back for that good effort up until the moment Uhhuh, that big surprise took place.

So there are questions to ask. “Oh my, what a surprise.” Yeah. To the child who’s crying, “you must be so disappointed. What hard work you both put into this? And now it’s all come apart.” And I would turn to the child who took the block and say, is there anything you can tell us about what just happened?

Because in my mind, there’s a million ways to understand it and I have no idea. But to come in charging. “You’ve done the wrong thing and now look at his face.” It’s just unhelpful.

I’ve been in this situation before and I’ve heard lots of things like “our time in the block, corners almost up, and I don’t want anyone else to knock it down.”

So he wanted to be the [00:27:00] one to knock it down, not give up their time, and have someone come in and crash it. That’s a good answer. That’s a good answer. But I think we need an alternative to surprising your partner here by just destroying it all of a sudden, and we’ll have to have that talk. We’ll have to make that plan.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: I can tell you what I’ve seen you do. In my observations of you over the years.

I have seen you say, let’s say we’ve got, I don’t know, Joey and Johnny, those are some names.

Joey, you seemed really surprised. Do you want to tell Johnny how you’re feeling?

And that then often elicited in my observations, the apology in a natural way. Yeah, because now you’re doing conflict resolution and they’re both expressing how they were feeling. And then instead of saying, say you’re sorry because you have to rote learn that’s the socially appropriate thing to do.

Yeah.

You come upon it naturally. [00:28:00] And by the way, the other beautiful thing that you just did was you managed two sets of feelings at once. That’s like masterclass right there.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah, we can both have, we can all have two feelings at one time, even the child that destroyed it might have been feeling very good about it, and I wouldn’t want to cast a judgment on that child. You can’t feel very good about being so destructive. Look at your friend’s face.” I, this whole thing is, there’s a lot to presume, but there’s better things to talk about.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And then it becomes a teachable moment instead of a moment of crime and punishment.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah, of ridicule, right? ‘Cause I don’t think the child can learn anything, especially in that moment by being ridiculed. I think the child pretty much knows. In the kindergarten, we talk a lot about what’s going on inside and conscience development. We don’t call it conscience. We talk about it as the inside helper, and we wonder what’s the inside helper might be telling you right now?

And a lot of kids, with the [00:29:00] ones that feel really badly about making mistakes just go ” I don’t have one of those. It’s not talking to me.” And we know that what’s really happening is he’s beating himself up for doing the wrong thing. So we want to help them grow that it, it’s a voice inside you and it can be a helpful voice; not a difficult voice to stand.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah. I don’t know if you’ll remember this, but years ago, years and years ago one of the kids who had some pretty big troubles with his feelings was in the kindergarten with you and I think he was having a struggle and I was on vacation and I was his therapist.

He saw me. Like every day.

And someone in the classroom said, what is your inside helper saying? And he said to you, I don’t know. She’s on vacation.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah. You got some work to do there inside her head. Inside your head.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah. I think in that moment it was, there was a lot of big feelings [00:30:00] about a lot of things and it was, I’ve made a mistake and I don’t have my helper to go talk to about it. That’s one of my favorites.

Rique Sollisch: We do want them to know they have this feeling does not have you, you have it.

And it is just the right feeling to feel like you’ve done the wrong thing or a mistake just happened. You’ve made a mistake, but your inside helper can be just that, a helper right now.

It can say, “what about fixing it or what about trying again?”

They can keep your voice in their head.

They could keep my voice in their head, but eventually they need to grow a voice that’s not so mean to them.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: That’s right.

Yeah. Excellent. Thank you. OK. We have one more. So we are always glad to get questions from our listeners and when time allows, we answer them in the podcast. If we can’t get to them here, we try to follow up directly.

If people send us an email, we will email back. But here’s a question. I am a divorced mother of two children, [00:31:00] ages five and eight. I’m barely on speaking terms with their dad, but he’s still a big part of our children’s lives. I’ve started dating someone and our relationship is getting serious. Both of my children have met him, but only superficially. It’s time for me to tell them more that he’s more than just a friend.

But I don’t know where to start or what to say.

Rique Sollisch: Yeah.

Yeah. Th… this is a good question, right? It’s just right to be wondering. It’s the right feeling. I think that just like any relationship that develops, it takes time and there’s a lot to learn about one another. And when we keep that in mind and consider that will also be true for the children, then a lot of planning, some of which may not actually pan out like you hope, but you do plan a time for them to talk together about this relationship changing into something that will last a long time and [00:32:00] invite the feelings that will also take more time, ’cause they will come in bits and they’ll come and change and they’ll come and grow. So we take ’em and we have them.

Just like the two adults had them and exchanged and discussed them, will allow the children to do the same.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And we don’t rush the relationship.

We allow it to grow organically and naturally.

Rique Sollisch: A time will come that will be right for them to meet and talk about more serious things. It goes slow and …

Dr. Kimberly Bell: And it, and you don’t want the new person to be trying to do this by buying gifts. Let’s sort of state some of the obvious, right? That ours is about time spent conversations, had recognitions of feelings, not about whether or not you take them to the amusement park or buy them things or, it’s about taking an interest and listening and having conversations and having a developed feeling of being understood between people.

And that will take time. [00:33:00]

Rique Sollisch: It all takes time. It comes out in very little bits, and I think you really know when you and another person adult have met and they’re, you’re good for each other, you’ll be able to handle the questions and feelings that the children will have.

You’ll do it naturally.

You’ll do it just like you would.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Without defensiveness and being able to stand the child’s feelings about it. And knowing that feelings change. I think sometimes if the initial response is not a positive one, parents get scared that’s the permanent decision. Right?

And it’s oh, let’s all just remember what Rique said, that feelings change. They start, they end, they come, they go.

Rique Sollisch: I think that if in a mature relationship that’s healthy, how the children feel does matter.

Dr. Kimberly Bell: Yeah, and I like what you said in the very beginning. That’s the exact right feeling to have right now with that that worry is a perfectly acceptable worry to have right now. And I guess I want to take time right now very quickly to let people know that is one of the other things that we [00:34:00] do at Hanna Perkins.

We are here for you When you have moments like that and you need a little bit of coaching or help with negative feelings or whatever it might be that you’re struggling with a parent consultant at Hanna Perkins is that’s the perfect time to let us know that you need some help. And you can do that simply by calling our offices at (216) 991-4472.

And you can see more about that also on our website, HannaPerkins.org.

OK, that is our time for today, Rique, which makes me very sad, but it is unfortunately the truth. If any of our listeners would like us to answer a question about their parenting concerns, they can send us an email at HiddenLanguageofChildren@gmail.com.

You can also visit our website, HiddenLanguageofChildren.org. Thank you for joining us. We hope you enjoyed this conversation as much as I did and found it to be helpful when making parenting decisions for your child. The Hidden Language of Children Podcast [00:35:00] is a production of the nonprofit Hanna Perkins Center for Child Development in beautiful Shaker Heights, Ohio.

Our audio video editor is Greg Romano. Bob Rosenbaum is the managing producer, and Dan Ratner is our consulting producer. If you like this podcast please subscribe to hear future episodes and share it with friends and family and coworkers and everybody that you know. We welcome your comments and your questions.

I’m Dr. Kimberly Bell, and we’ll see you next time.